I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
