If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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