I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
