who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
