just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
