I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
