Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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