Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize