careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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