Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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