I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
