community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
