At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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