he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
We are all done wearing pants today
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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