did you get engaged???
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
