So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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