so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
