Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
