I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
