Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
