I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
