Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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