smell my finger.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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