she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Randomize
