Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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