she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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