i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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