ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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