how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
