so explain again why im purple
no
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I will pee on everything he values.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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