dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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