I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
