why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
