so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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