After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize