I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize