Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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