Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize