I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
