Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
