I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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