feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
