Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
