The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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