# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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