Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
