what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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