Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Randomize
