Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
