AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
