My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
